Damning feedback from the wife of one of my clients

“Weirdly I feel like he’s enjoying the adrenaline a little bit – but it’s not great for his health long term – I think he’ll crash at some point!”

I know what you’re thinking, why is his wife even part of the coaching programme? But who better to give an honest insight into one of his key aims: to be more present at home.

I’d just commented on how exhausting it must be for him to visit multiple countries to firefight a crisis. Exhausting, yes….but maybe it’s more complicated.

Having to step up a gear and urgently problem-solve is quite attractive. This ability to jump into the thick of it, untangling problems, and soothing relationships – while possibly wearing a cape.

OK, maybe the cape is going too far. 😀

But you know that feeling, the blood is rushing through your veins, and you feel IN DEMAND. I have three words for you.

At. What. Cost

My client will be fine – he’s done the hard yards and is not mindlessly firefighting. His position in the business requires a certain amount of ‘jumping, how high?’ behaviour.  But I am still curious how much he is drawn towards the heroics.

If it feels good, does it even matter?

It depends what it stops you doing (the work that is truly important but doesn’t feel urgent) and whether it disempowered your team.

  • And how do you feel after the adrenaline rush?
  • Is it serving you to feel like this – and what is the impact on your health?
  • Is there someone else that could be the hero?
  • And what led up to the need for all these heroics in the first place?

My challenge to you: consider all these questions before you even open the wardrobe where you store your cape.

And I’d love to hear your answers – you never know, maybe I can help you put the cape away for good.